NEEDS
ARE A FUNCTION
OF WHAT
OTHER PEOPLE HAVE
*
DONT WORRY
WONDER
*
DANCING
IS FOREPLAY
*
DELAY
IS THE WORST FORM
OF DENIAL
*
AN ELEPHANT
IS A MOUSE
BUILT
TO GOVERNMENT SPECIFICATIONS
*
DON'T START
ANYTHING
YOU
CAN'T STOP
*
TAKE THINGS
ALWAYS
BY THE
SMOOTH END
*
IF YOU ARE
GOING TO BE
A BEAR
BE A GRIZZLY
*
SPEECH
DOES NOT NECESSARILY
COME
FROM THE TONGUE
*
KISSING
A SMOKER
IS LIKE LICKING
AN ASHTRAY
*

LIFE IS LIKE A SHIT SANDWICH
THE MORE BREAD YOU HAVE
THE LESS SHIT
YOU HAVE TO EAT
*
WHEN CHOOSING
BETWEEN TWO EVILS
CHOOSE THE ONE
YOU HAVE NOT TRIED BEFORE
*
EVEN THOUGH
HIGHLY EVOLVED
WE ARE ALL
STILL ANIMALS
*
YOU CANNOT TELL
HOW DEEP A PUDDLE IS
UNTIL
YOU STEP IN IT
*
IF TWO WRONGS
DO NOT MAKE
A RIGHT
TRY THREE
*
NEVER LET GO
OF WHAT YOU HAVE
UNTIL YOU HAVE GOT
SOMETHING ELSE
*
OPEN A CAN OF WORMS
AND THE ONLY WAY
TO RE-CAN THEM
IS TO GET A BIGGER CAN
*
NEVER INSULT
AN ALLIGATOR
TIL YOU ARE
ACROSS THE SWAMP
*
GO TO FRIENDS FOR ADVICE
TO WOMEN FOR PITY
TO STRANGERS FOR CHARITY
TO RELATIVES FOR NOTHING
*
INDECISION
IS THE KEY
TO FLEXIBILITY
*

YOU CANNOT TELL
WHICH WAY
THE TRAIN WENT
BY LOOKING AT THE TRACKS
*
NEVER WRESTLE
WITH A PIG
YOU BOTH GET DIRTY
AND THE PIG LIKES IT
*
BLEESED ARE THOSE
WHO EXPECT LITTLE
THEY SHALL
SELDOM BE DISAPPOINTED
*
LOVE MANY
TRUST FEW
ALWAYS PADDLE
YOU OWN CANOE
*
IT IS EASY
TO SUGGEST SOLUTIONS
WHEN YOU DONT KNOW MUCH
ABOUT THE PROBLEM
*
IF YOU ARE NOTHING
TO YOURSELF
WHAT DO YOU
HAVE TO GIVE?
*
A BUREAUCRACY
IS LIKE A SEPTIC TANK
THE BIG CHUNKS
RISE TO THE TOP
*
NEVER ARGUE
WITH SOMEONE
WHO BUYS INK
BY THE BARREL
*
IF YOU
CANNOT REMEMBER IT
IT COULD NOT
HAVE BEEN IMPORTANT
*
PRAISE
DOES WONDERS
FOR THE SENSE
OF HEARING
*

BEWARE
EQUALLY
OF SUDDEN FRIENDS
AND SLOW ENEMIES
*
TO BE POSITIVE
IS TO RISK BEING MISTAKEN
AT THE TOP
OF YOUR VOICE
*
IF YOUR ONLY TOOL
IS A HAMMER
ALL YOUR PROBLEMS
LOOK LIKE NAILS
*
YOU
NEVER LOSE
UNLESS
YOU GIVE UP
*
ACTIVITY
IS AN ANTIDOTE
FOR FEAR
*
RARELY
WILL ANYTHING
TURN OUT AS BAD
AS YOU FEAR
*
ONLY THE UNBORN
THE VERY YOUNG
AND THE DEAD
HAVE NO PROBLEMS
*
LOVE
IS WHEN
ANOTHERS HAPPINESS
IS ESSENTIAL TO YOUR OWN
*
MEN
ARE OBSESSIVE
WOMEN
ARE HYSTERICAL
*
FAILURE IS A TEACHER
NOT AN UNDERTAKER
A DELAY NOT A DEFEAT
A DETOUR NOT A DEADEND
*

RATS LAMBS
WHALES
AND HUMANS
ALL DRINK MILK
*
ALWAYS
TRAVEL
THE PATH
WITH HEART
*
NEVER WEED
A GARDEN
WITH
A BULLDOZER
*
DO NOT
CONFUSE
BEING TAUGHT
WITH LEARNING
*
DO NOT
BE AFRAID
OF BEING
AFRAID
*
ONLY
YOU
CAN MAKE A FOOL
OF YOU
*
WHAT'S RIGHT
IS WHAT'S LEFT
AFTER YOU DO
EVERYTHING ELSE WRONG
*
IT'S
THE BRAKES
IN LIFE
THAT COUNT
*
ONE
WELL PAID
IS
WELL SATISFIED
*
TRUE ELOQUENCE
SAYS
ALL THAT SHOULD BE
NOT ALL THAT COULD BE
*

THINKING IS MORE INTERESTING
THAN KNOWING
BUT LESS ENTERTAINING
THAN LOOKING
*
SUCCESS
HIDES MANY ERRORS
*
DO THE BEST
YOU CAN
THEN
TO HELL WITH IT
*
THE MOST IMPORTANT THING
IN LIFE
IS NOT HAVING THE RIGHT ANSWER
BUT HAVING THE RIGHT PROBLEM
*
YOU CANNOT RID YOURSELF
OF SHADOWS
BY TURNING OUT
THE LIGHT
*
NEVER SPIT
IN A WELL
YOU MAY DRINK FROM IT
ONE DAY
*
LIVE
AND LEARN
DIE
AND FORGET
*
IDEAS
UNMATED WITH REALITY
PRODUCE
FEW OFFSPRING
*
DO NOT EXPECT
ANYBODY
TO FOLLOW YOU
IF YOU DO NOT LEAD
*
PEOPLE
CANNOT WALK ON YOU
UNLESS YOU LIE DOWN
FOR THEM
*

IDLENESS
TRAVELS SLOWLY
POVERTY
SOON OVERTAKES IT
*
SAVE YOUR FACE
ALL DAY
LOSE YOUR ASS
ALL NIGHT
*
THE MOST IMPORTANT THINGS
YOU MUST LEARN
NO ONE ELSE
CAN TEACH YOU
*
IF YOU CANNOT
GET YOUR HEAD
ABOVE THE WATER
YOU PROBABLY CANNOT SWIM
*
ANYTHING
BELIEVED BY ALL
IS SURE
TO BE WRONG
*
YARD BY YARD
LIFE IS HARD
INCH BY INCH
IT IS A CINCH
*
LIFE MAY
NOT BE FAIR
BUT IT CAN
BE EQUALIZED
*
FIND
ONE CORNER
AND YOU CAN FIND
THE OTHER THREE
*
FAMILIARITY
BREEDS
INTENT
*
LOVE
IS A
FOUR LEGGED
WORD
*

THUNDER
IS IMPRESSIVE
BUT LIGHTNING
IS MORE DANGEROUS
*
TIME
LAPSING AND COLLAPSING
ADVANCES
DAY BY DAY
*
THE FASTER
YOU GO
THE EASIER IT IS
TO GO FAST
*
THE WAY
MAY BE HARD
BUT HARD
IS THE WAY
*
LACK OF WILL
NOT
LACK OF STRENGTH
DEFEATS SUCCESS
*
THEY
JEST AT SCARS
WHO NEVER FELT
A WOUND
*
RENUNCIATION
DOES NOT GIVE UP THINGS
BUT ACCEPTS
THAT THEY GO AWAY
*
SOME MEET
NEW IDEAS CURIOUSLY
OTHERS MEET
THEM FEARFULLY
*
MANY IDEAS
ARE RUINED
BY POPULARITY
*
THE TIME
YOU ARE KILLING
IS YOUR OWN
*

EVERYBODY
IS LOOKING
FOR SOMETHING
*
I FINALLY KNOW
WHAT IS GOING ON
AND I STILL
DO NOT LIKE IT
*
TIME IS A LINE
CONTINUALLY BRANCHING
PRESENTING MORE CHOICES
AND DECISIONS
*
A DIRTY MIND
IS A WEALTH
OF PLEASURE
*
A BLIND MAN
FEARS NO SNAKES
*
ONE BEST
CAN PITY
WHO HAS FELT
THE WOE
*
CONTEMPLATION
OF LIFE
DECIDES THE CHOICE
ADVANCE OR RETREAT
*
THE CHIEF PUNISHMENT
OF A LIAR
IS THAT THEY
CANNOT BELIEVE OTHERS
*
THERE IS ALWAYS
SOME LITTLE THING
THAT IS TOO BIG
FOR US
*
IF YOU KNEW
YOU WERE DYING
HOW IMPORTANT
WOULD BE YOUR PROBLEMS
*

YOU CANNOT
JUDGE PEOPLE
BY THE ACRE
*
A FOOL THINKS
I AM WISE
A WISE PERSON KNOWS
I AM A FOOL
*
SOME PROBLEMS
DO NOT
HAVE SOLUTIONS
ONLY CONSEQUENCES
*
YOU CANNOT
MAKE A REVOLUTION
IF YOU
HAVE TO MAKE A LIVING
*
EVERYONE
MAKES MISTAKES
IF YOU ARE SMART
IT WILL NOT BE TWICE
*
THERE IS NO FUTURE
IT IS A HOAX
TO TRAP YOU
INTO BEHAVING
*
IF YOU
DO NOT KNOW YOUR RIGHTS
YOU PROBABLY
DO NOT HAVE VERY MANY
*
IF YOU
KEEP A MONKEY
BE PREPARED
TO PAY FOR BROKEN GLASS
*
THE ONLY WAY TO KEEP YOUR HEALTH
IS TO EAT WHAT YOU DONT WANT
DRINK WHAT YOU DONT LIKE
AND DO WHAT YOU HAD RATHER NOT
*
TAKE
FROM NO ONE
THEIR
SONG
*

NEVER
SHOUT IT OUT
WHEN YOU CAN
TALK IT OUT
*
FROM THE TIME
WE ARE BORN
WE MAKE
ASSUMPTIONS
*
AS YOU AGE
YOU BECOME
SURER AND SURER
OF LESS AND LESS
*
CHOOSE YOUR RUT
CAREFULLY
YOU MAY BE IN IT
THE REST OF YOUR LIFE
*
THERE ARE NO
SIMPLE SOLUTIONS
ONLY
SIMPLE MINDS
*
INTELLIGENCE
IS NOT A VIRTUE
IT IS
A TRAIT
*
IF THE TIME
IS NOT RIGHT
DOING THE RIGHT THING
MEANS NOTHING
*
IT IS EASY
TO RECOMMEND
IMPOSSIBLE SOLUTIONS
*
FREEDOM
SOMETIMES MEANS
DEFINING
WHAT YOU WILL NOT DO
*
IF THERE IS
ALWAYS ROOM AT THE TOP
WHY IS THERE SO MUCH
SHOVING UP THERE
*

SOMEONE
WITH A POOR MEMORY
MAKES
A BAD LIAR
*
BE
YOUR OWN REFUGE
NO ONE ELSE
CAN BE
*
IF YOU
DO NOT PLAY THE GAME
DO NOT MAKE
THE RULES
*
A BASEMENT
IS A WELL
WHERE YOU TRY TO KEEP
OUT THE WATER
*
THE QUALITY
OF LIFE
IS INVERSELY PROPORTIONAL
TO ENERGY CONSUMPTION
*
YOU GOT TO MAKE
YOUR OWN MISTAKES
KEEP OTHER PEOPLE FROM MAKING THEIRS
AND THEY GET MAD AT YOU
*
OLD AGE
IS ONE OF THE MOST
UNEXPECTED THINGS
THAT CAN HAPPEN
*
PUTTING A PROBLEM
IN PERSPECTIVE
IS THE FIRST STEP
IN FINDING ITS VANISHING POINT
*
LAUGH AT YOURSELF
AND
YOU WILL BE AMUSED
YOUR WHOLE LIFE
*
TIME
MARKS US
WHILE WE
MARK TIME
*

WORRY
IS PUTTING
TODAY'S SUN
UNDER TOMORROW'S CLOUD
*
WILL POWER
TAKES A LOT
OF WONT POWER
*
LIFE IS 10%
WHAT YOU MAKE IT
AND 90%
HOW YOU TAKE IT
*
AGE
IS TIME AND DECLINE
NIPPING
AT OUR HEELS
*
IT ONLY SEEMS KINKY
THE FIRST TIME
*
IF YOU TELL
THE TRUTH
YOU DO NOT HAVE TO REMEMBER
ANYTHING
*
NO ONE
IS LISTENING
UNTIL YOU MAKE
A MISTAKE
*
NEVER TEST
THE DEPTH
OF THE WATER
WITH BOTH FEET
*
WE
ARE BORN
NAKED WET AND HUNGRY
THEN THINGS GET WORSE
*
REMEMBER
YOU ARE A HUMAN BEING
NOT
A HUMAN DOING
*

IF YOU CUT
TOO MANY CORNERS
YOU END UP
GOING IN CIRCLES
*
PEOPLE USUALLY LEAVE
THREE WRITTEN RECORDS
WHEN THEY ARE HATCHED
MATCHED AND DISPATCHED
*
THE ONLY RACE
THAT IS IMPORTANT
IS THE HUMAN RACE
*
CONSCIENCE
IS WHAT HURTS
WHEN EVERYTHING ELSE
FEELS SO GOOD
*
TALK
IS CHEAP
BECAUSE SUPPLY
EXCEEDS DEMAND
*
THERE ARE MORE
HORSES' ASSES
IN THIS WORLD
THAN THERE ARE HORSES
*
IF YOU ARE ON
THE RIGHT TRACK
YOU WILL STILL GET RUN OVER
IF YOU JUST SIT THERE
*
IN
TWO DAYS
TOMORROW
WILL BE YESTERDAY
*
IF MARRIAGE
WERE OUTLAWED
ONLY OUTLAWS
WOULD HAVE INLAWS
*
YOU DO NOT STOP LAUGHING
BECAUSE YOU GROW OLD
YOU GROW OLD
BECAUSE YOU STOP LAUGHING
*

DO NOT TAKE
YOUR LIFE
TOO SERIOUSLY
ITS NOT PERMANENT
*
BLESSED
ARE THE CRACKED
FOR THEY SHALL
LET IN THE LIGHT
*
WHEN RELIGION
RULED THE WORLD
IT WAS CALLED
THE DARK AGES
*
BLESSED ARE THE FLEXIBLE
FOR THEY
SHALL NEVER BE BENT
OUT OF SHAPE
*
YOU CANNOT KNOW
WHERE YOU ARE GOING
BUT YOU CAN KNOW
WHERE YOU HAVE BEEN
*
DO NOT LET
SOMEONE ELSE
USE YOUR HEAD
FOR A PLAYGROUND
*
LOVE IS HEARING
A LITTLE SURGING
UNDER THE THUNDER
OF THE DARKEST DAY
*
THE PRESENT
IS DETERMINED BY THE PAST
BE CAREFUL IN THE FUTURE
OF WHAT YOU DO IN THE PAST
*
ANYTIME YOU HAVE A 50-50 CHANCE
OF GETTING SOMETHING RIGHT,
THERE IS A 90% PROBABILITY
YOU WILL GET IT WRONG
*
IF YOU GO
FAST ENOUGH
YOU CANNOT TELL
WHERE YOU CAME FROM
*

NO ONE
IN A HURRY
IS QUITE
CIVILIZED
*
QUITTING
WHILE YOU ARE AHEAD
IS NOT THE SAME
AS QUITTING
*
WORRY
IS A ROCKING CHAIR
THAT WILL NEVER
TAKE YOU ANYWHERE
*
TODAY'S MIGHTY OAK
IS JUST YESTERDAY'S
NUT THAT HELD
ITS GROUND.
*
LAUGHING
IS GOOD EXERCISE
IT IS LIKE JOGGING
ON THE INSIDE.
*
EVERY PROBLEM
HAS A SOLUTION
THAT IS SIMPLE
CLEAR AND WRONG
*
AN ERROR
DOES NOT BECOME A MISTAKE
UNTIL YOU REFUSE
TO CORRECT IT
*
THE ONLY PERSON
WHO IS WITH YOU
YOUR ENTIRE LIFE
IS YOURSELF.
*
BE KINDER
THAN NECESSARY
EVERYONE YOU MEET
IS FIGHTING A BATTLE.
*
WINE DOES NOT MAKE YOU FAT
IT MAKES YOU LEAN
AGAINST TABLES CHAIRS FLOORS
WALLS AND UGLY PEOPLE.
*

WHEN IN DOUBT,
DON'T!
IF YOU ARE SURE,
HESITATE!
*
THE BEST THINGS IN LIFE
ARE ON LOAN
WHAT CAN YOU LOSE
THAT YOU NEVER OWNED?
*
DO NOT
BELIEVE
EVERYTHING
YOU THINK.
*
DEATH IS ONLY A SOUND
WE MAKE
TO SIGNIFY THE THING
WE DO NOT KNOW.
*
BECOMING A FATHER
IS SEX
BECOMING A DADDY
IS LOVE.
*
APPRECIATE
WHAT YOU HAVE
BEFORE IT TURNS INTO
WHAT YOU HAD.
*
THE PAST
IS A STATEMENT
THE FUTURE
IS A QUESTION.
*
THE PAST
CANNOT BE CHANGED
IT CAN
ONLY BE ACCEPTED.
*
TO BE
OLD AND WISE
YOU MUST FIRST
BE YOUNG AND STUPID.
*
IT IS EASY
TO BELIEVE LIES
WHEN YOU DO NOT CARE
ABOUT THE TRUTH.
*

CHILDHOOD
IS FLEETING
BUT IMMATURITY
CAN LAST A LIFETIME.
*
SOME KNOW MORE AND MORE
ABOUT LESS AND LEES
UNTIL THEY KNOW
EVERYTHING ABOUT NOTHING.
*
NOW
I KNOW ENOUGH
TO KNOW
WHAT I MISSED.
*
WHAT
YOU ALLOW
IS WHAT
WILL CONTINUE.
*
GIVE ME COFFEE
TO CHANGE THE THINGS I CAN
GIVE ME WINE
TO ACCEPT THE THINGS I CANNOT.
*
IT IS EASIER
TO BELIEVE
THAN IT IS
TO THINK.
*
IT TAKES TWO
TO FIND LOVE
BUT ONLY ONE
TO LOSE IT.
*
IT
IS GETTING
LATER
ALL THE TIME.
*
YOU CANNOT MAKE A FACT
OUT OF AN OPINION
BY RAISING
YOUR VOICE.
*
A BELIEF
IS A CONVICTION
AWAITING
PROOF.
*

SCIENCE
IS TRUE
NO MATTER
WHAT YOU BELIEVE.
*
JUST BECAUSE
YOU BELIEVE IT
DOES NOT MAKE
TRUE.
*
THE PROBLEM
WITH THE FUTURE
IS THAT IT KEEPS TURNING
INTO THE PRESENT.
*
SOME WOULD
RATHER SEEK FORGIVENESS
THAN ASK
FOR PERMISSION.
*
THE GREATER
THE IGNORANCE
THE STRONGER
THE OPINION.
*
WE WERE ALL HUMANS
UNTIL
RACE DISCONNECTED US
RELIGION SEPARATED US
POLITICS DIVIDED US
AND WEALTH CLASSIFIED US.
*
THE QUICKEST WAY
TO GET RICH
IS TO RID YOURSELF
OF WHAT YOU DO NOT NEED.
*
TODAY
IS THE GOOD OLD DAYS
20 YEARS
FROM NOW.
*
SOME THINGS
ARE HALF A FOOT ONE WAY
AND SIX INCHES THE OTHER
HALF OF EACH
AND NEITHER OF EITHER.
*
ANYONE
WHO IS LIVING WITH YOU
WHO IS NOT YOU
IS A PROBLEM.
*

PEOPLE ARE DETERMINED TO BELIEVE
WHATEVER THEY HAVE TO
IN ORDER TO SUPPORT THE WORLDVIEW
THEY WANT TO HAVE.
*
STEAL LIGHT
FROM THE PAST
TO ILLUMINATE
THE FUTURE.
*
LAZY MINDS
EASILY ACCEPT
BULLSHIT.
*
THE BASIC DELUSION
IS THAT WE HAVE TO
ATTAIN SOMETHING.
*
THE MORE YOU REALIZE
THE MORE YOU REALIZE
THERE IS NOTHING
TO REALIZE.
*
TO BE ALONE
IS NOT TO BE LONELY
IF YOU LIKE SOLITUDE
YOU ARE NEVER ALONE.
*
HELL
IS OTHER PEOPLE.
*
IF YOU CAN SEE
THE BANDWAGON
IT IS TOO LATE
TO GET ON.
*
YOU HAVE NEVER
BEEN THIS OLD BEFORE
BUT YOU WILL NEVER
BE THIS YOUNG AGAIN.
*
DO NOT ARGUE ABOUT
POLITICS AND RELIGION
SOMEBODY MIGHT GET MAD
AND IT COULD BE YOU
*

A GOOD FANTASY
BEATS
REALITY
EVERY TIME
*
REMEMBER
EVERY THING
WHETHER IT HAPPENED
OR NOT
*
ALTHOUGH
IT SEEMS THAT I KNOW
THAT I KNOW
WHAT I WOULD LIKE TO SEE
IS THE I THAT KNOWS ME
WHEN I KNOW THAT I KNOW
THAT I KNOW
*
THIS IS IT
AND I AM IT
AND YOU ARE IT
AND HE IS IT
AND SHE IS IT
AND IT IS THAT
AND THAT IS IT
AND THAT IS THAT
*
THE ONLY
EXACT SCIENCE
IS
HINDSIGHT
*
I KNOW THAT I KNOW
AND I KNOW WHEN I DON'T KNOW
BUT I DON'T KNOW WHEN I DON'T KNOW
THAT I DON'T KNOW
*
IT IS NOT WHAT YOU DO NOT KNOW
THAT GETS YOU IN TROUBLE
IT IS WHAT YOU KNOW FOR SURE
THAT JUST IS NOT SO
*
WHEN YOU THINK
OF WATER
THINK
OF THE WELL DIGGER
*
HAPPINESS NEEDS
SOMETHING TO DO
SOMEONE TO LOVE
SOMETHING TO HOPE FOR
*
IF THE PRESENT
JUDGES THE PAST
IT WILL LOSE
THE FUTURE

IF WISHES
WERE HORSES
BEGGARS
WOULD RIDE
*
PEOPLE DON'T GET INTO TROUBLE
WHEN THEY TALK TO EACH OTHER
THEY GET INTO TROUBLE
WHEN THEY TALK ABOUT EACH OTHER
*
IN THE INFORMATION AGE
IGNORANCE IS A CHOICE
*
BELIEF IN DESTINY
ENCOURAGES RESIGNATION IN THE POOR
AND COMPLACENCY
AMONG THE POWERFUL
*
IF PEOPLE DON'T WANT TO DO SOMETHING
YOU CAN'T STOP THEM
*
WHEN ARGUING ABOUT POLITICS AND RELIGION
IT DOES NOT PASS A COST-BENEFIT ANALYSIS
OF TIME AND EFFORT EXPENDED
CONSIDERING THE PREDICTABLE RESULTS
*
I DO NOT KNOW
WHERE I AM GOING
BUT I AM GOING
SOMEWHERE
*
WE ARE TALKING
MORE AND MORE
BUT COMMUNICATING
LESS AND LESS
*
THE MAIN DIFFERENCE
TWIXT A BAD DAY
AND A GOOD DAY
IS YOUR ATTITUDE
*
YOU ARE
ALL YOU HAVE
AND I AM
ALL I GOT
*

THE FASTER
I GO
THE BEHINDER
I GET
*

I CAME
FROM NOWHERE
AND I AM WORKING
MY WAY BACK
*